Written by Steve Poe, a contemporary author. This is an excerpt from his book “Creatures of Habit.”
Feelings of guilt often come because you don’t think you measure up to your own high standards or because you did something you think you shouldn’t have done or failed to do something you think you should have done. It’s a feeling of shame or regret because of bad conduct or, more often, perceived bad conduct. And you keep yourself in that state of guilt because you think you need to pay for what you did or didn’t do… You do need some guilt. If you have never experienced guilt, it could be a sign you are a sociopath or have narcissistic personality disorder, making you one of those rare people who are incapable of feeling guilt or regret. There are actually two types of guilt. There is the healthy kind that comes from the Holy Spirit. It is intended to lead us to repentance and a return to God’s plan for our life. Once we respond to the conviction of the Holy Spirit, that guilt is gone and replaced by God’s peace and joy. The other type of guilt is often called false guilt. That’s when you have feelings of guilt even though you haven’t done anything wrong. Or maybe you did do something wrong but have already fixed it and asked God to forgive you — and yet you still feel guilty… People driven by false guilt feel they have to do everything perfectly so they don’t disappoint others… False guilt can also be caused by the feeling that you are responsible to save everyone that crosses your path or asks for help. This type of guilt is self-destructive and abusive. It will do harm to your relationship with God, with others, and with yourself. It puts a heavy burden on your back, a burden you were never intended to shoulder… Some people actually get so overwhelmed with guilt or regret they become physically ill, while others become so overwhelmed they take their own life. I’ve seen Christians walk away from their faith because they can’t handle the guilt from a mistake or wrong choice they’ve made. Guilt is hard to live with. This is what regret or guilt does: it consumes you. While the weight of it will pull you down emotionally, the disappointments will disillusion you. If you are tired of feeling guilty all the time, why not make a decision to do something about it? Guilt is never a pleasant emotion. However, it’s an emotion you can work through successfully and then, over time, eradicate from your life.
Prayer:
Written by Scotty Smith, a contemporary pastor.
Gracious Father, it’s nearly impossible for me to imagine there was a day when the emotion of shame did not exist. In their innocence, our first parents were absolutely free of any need to turn away from your gaze, or from the gaze of one another. There was no need to fear, cover up, hide, pose, pretend, get defensive, feel guilty, make excuses, blame the other, want to disappear, do penance, numb out, medicate, or try any other broken attempt to deal with the disintegrating effects of shame. It is only in you, Lord Jesus, that we now find hope to deal with both our guilt and our shame. For in light of the joy set before you by the Father, you endured the agony of the cross for us, scorning, despising, disregarding its shame—giving the shame of such a vilifying death no ultimate defining power over you. You took the shame of being made sin for us, that in you we might become the righteousness of God. Jesus, you shamed shame! What glory, what grace, what majesty, what mercy! And now, those who trust in you don’t have to be defined by shame and will never be put to shame, for you took our guilt and shame and made them yours. And NOW we are living in the present and eternal favor of God—his steadfast love and great delight. How can we ever praise you enough for such —for such a rich standing in grace and such a deep rootedness in love? Amen.
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